A long, long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, I wrote a post about my abusive relationship on another blog. This blog has long since been deleted as well as the posts I wrote with it. I did copy over some of my posts to an external drive that I felt may be worth sharing again one day. This drama-filled, emotional personal story was one of the ones I have kept for years, unsure if I should edit it and re-share it or let it die. It was an extremely dark, abusive, and unhealthy time in my life from the age of about fifteen to twenty. Here I am at 27, almost 28, re-reading what I wrote several years ago, fresh from my break up.
Ever since I started my “Mental Health in the Geek Community” series, I have wanted to tell the story about how fandoms helped me through this horrible break up. I have stopped myself over and over again, fearful of what wounds would be re-opened or what drama or revealed secrets would befall me. I’ve been in therapy now for about 2 years, and I think it’s finally time that I share a bit of my story about how Doctor Who helped me heal and move on from an abusive teenage relationship.
Trigger Warning: I got into detail about the abuse I endured. It’s okay if you want to skip this post. I’ll see you in the next one.
Continue reading “How Doctor Who Helped Me Get Over a Break Up”
I’m three years old, and I’m holding your hand as we walk towards a baseball field. I feel safe when you hold my hand. I feel safe when I’m in your arms. I wish you’d hold me more. I wish you’d play with me more. I wish you were home more. My world is so small for now, but I know I love you.
I often wonder what you thought about when you and mom planned to have me. Did you think of my first steps? Or perhaps my first word? Or maybe you pictured the same blue eyes you have looking back up at you. Did you ever think that things would be the way they are today?
Continue reading “To a Father; Love, a Daughter”
Last October, Alec and I finally celebrated our marriage with our family and friends in the form of a wedding in my little home town in Alabama. Our first year of being married was a whirl wind of immigration paperwork and appointments, wedding & honeymoon planning, saving money, family members passing, and just trying to navigate the joyous emotions of finally being together after being long distance for about four years.
Continue reading “Spoilers! Two Years of Geeky Marriage Bliss + a Letter to My Spouse”
Needle & Thread
How can I give a heart
that is damaged and broken?
Continue reading “Monday Musings: Needle & Thread”
Love Like Winter
Her cold hands can barely feel his heat.
His lips tingle when he kisses her.
Ice meeting the sun.
Continue reading “Monday Musings: Love Like Winter”